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Thursday, October 11, 2007

Critique - TNT and Martial Arts



First off, the TNT clip:

I can't wait to see the final version (love the foot traces as he slides back - how are you going to make them visible? Are they just geometry, little spheres?).

The main thing that sticks out is his facial expression around x188. At the beginning of the shot, before he bends down to pick up the box, you see him screaming. That expression needs to be while he throws the box and clearly visible at x188, a scream of power and desperation, hoping that the box is far away enough.
There is something about that pose pause around x190 to x200. I would add some overlap or continuing acting with his body. Right now it seems like he pauses for a bit in order to go to the shocked expression at x209. It's a bit too pose to pose.
Speaking of x209, I would offset the arms in terms of posing a bit. At x209 (during that section) both arms are stretched out and down. I would take the screen right one and move it up a bit (see image), give it more negative space between the chest and the upper arm.
I'll take a look at it at home for a more detailed critique.

Again, the foot traces are great, now you need to add little touches like that to the set. Give the walls some character (don't have them be straight lines for instance), same with the boxes and the ground. Keep going, nice work!

The martial arts one is coming along nicely. One part that stuck out was around x176 where the poses could be stronger.
As you get further along, add some detail to the foot when he holds the pose at x40 (right now it's pointed up with the same rotation throughout, you could tense the foot more right before he goes into the next action, or relaxe it a bit, just keep it alive). Same with the head, it feels locked.
Would be cool to add some breathing or strong inhale/exhales during certain moments, gathering his strength before the next salve for instance.

Hope that helps!
Cheers

JD

3 comments:

Joey said...

Thanks you so much, I'm fixing on it. :-) Have a nice weekend!

Anonymous said...

Just adding a quick comment. I think the right hand looks a little magnetic in the way that it grabs the box. It feels a little as if the hand it being attracted to the box, and doesn't feel like its naturally grabbing the box.

Joey said...

Yeah, I felt the same way.. I am trying to get rid of that feeling though.. I hope I can the right feeling.. thanks! I think I need good contact pose on hands and more nice spacing.. Thanks

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